I have a confession. With the first presidential candidate debate in the books, and Donald Trump acting odder and odder, I have found myself indulging in a bit of a guilty pleasure. With the prospect of a Trump presidency looking very iffy at best, and Hillary Clinton starting to look presidential, I have come to the realisation that should The Donald lose, observers will be denied countless gaffes and exhibits of asininity. I apologise to my US friends but I think it is best I open up about this.
Don’t get me wrong, Clinton is clearly the better candidate and would make a much better president, but Trump provides an entertainment aspect that, frankly I would miss. So I’ll come clean, my guilty pleasure is indulging in the possibility of a Trump presidency.
Professional observers, editorial writers, political cartoonists and armchair sociologists like myself the world over will be denied an almost manna-like gift should Trump be defeated. With a Clinton administration, gone will be the possibility of Trump looking straight at facts and refuting them, claiming victory when absolutely no independent sources concur, and sending nonsensical Tweets at all hours of the night and day.
When I allow my guilty pleasure to run wild I imagine President Trump threatening to invade Chicago to clear up the violence problem. Then perhaps he’d expound on the problem of illegal aliens, suggesting a severe tariff be placed on their UFOs and refusing outright any possibility of these space creatures ever becoming US citizens. “We’re going to build a dome, and those aliens are going to pay for it.”
What a missed opportunity it will be should Clinton win. I can picture Trump being sworn in at his inauguration and lightning bolts raining down upon the dais as he places his liar’s hand on the Bible while taking the oath. No President Trump going off teleprompter while addressing the United Nations, as an army of speechwriters cringes in fear.
A Clinton presidency will rob us of the potential of a president who will demand that someone knock the crap out of a filibustering opponent. (Although I suspect this has been said before, but within the confines of the Oval Office.) A leader who will refuse to meet with another world leader who is a woman, because … well, she’s a woman. Resorting instead to Tweeting about her appearance.
No, it cannot be denied that a Clinton victory, while potentially providing good government, will strip the world of countless Trumpisms. Pity, enjoy it while we can.