Not quite Hitchcock, but a shocking shower scene nonetheless


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Yesterday morning while indulging in my daily ablutions – I know, writing that I was taking a shower would have sufficed, but I really like the word ablutions – I noticed something I hadn’t seen before. While rinsing the shampoo from my hair I saw writing on the shower head, right in the center where there are no holes for the water.

Needless to say it is my habit not to wear my glasses while showering, although I’d be lying if I said I’d never stepped into the shower and marveled at how clear it appeared, thinking that new cleansing product is wonderful,  only to realize my specs were still on.

A cruel joke no doubt, or perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy

So when I faced the flow of water I naturally closed my eyes to protect them not only from the dreaded shampoo sting – no No Tears Baby Shampoo for this Amigo – but also from the pelting hot water. But at one point my eyes did open and I could see words on the shower head.

Now I was more than merely curious, I was driven, a man on a mission to find out who the hell would put writing there, and what would it say?   Did I wait until after my shower when there were no driving torrents of water? Did I hell! Bravely, some would correctly say stupidly, I pressed on and approached the shower head, the source of the hot pin-like darts of water that were coming at me like bullets from a should-be-illegal assault weapon.

… lest I spend the rest of the day hopping on one foot while banging the side of my head and saying “What’s that? Huh? Come again”

Gritting my teeth behind my tightly pressed lips and making certain to move straight on and not turn my head left or right lest I spend the rest of the day hopping on one foot while banging the side of my head and saying “What’s that? Huh? Come again”.

Eventually my diligence (foolishness?) paid off and I was able to decipher the words engraved on the shower head while blinking and squinting madly. What message had the manufacturer felt was so important that they placed it front and center? It said “Warning: Avoid direct contact with eyes”! A cruel joke no doubt, or perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Logo_3DCMontreal is a Montreal writer born and raised who likes to establish balance and juxtapositions; a bit of this and a bit of that. a dash of Yin and a soupçon of Yang, some Peaks and Freans and maybe a bit of a sting in the tail! Please follow DC on Twitter @DCMontreal and on Facebook, and add him on Google+
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